Don't Pee in the Pool

from by Mike Debenham

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lyrics

My parents told me when I was a boy
On the first day of school:
'You can do as you please in this crazy old world,
Just don't pee in the pool.'

'You can pee in the bushes, you can pee on the lawn,
You can pee in a hole if you need to.
You can pee in a toilet like normal folk do.
Just don't pee in the pool.'

All through my life I remembered their words.
It was my golden rule
Till one summer morning at age forty-five
I peed in the pool.

You can pee in the bushes, you can pee on a wall,
You can pee in your pants if you need to.
But then one summer morning at age forty-five
I peed in the pool.

My friends started screaming, the water grew rough.
A voice from on high said, 'Enough is enough!'
The aliens landed and pinched all my stuff
And enslaved all humanity.

I woke the next morning in my prison bed.
I felt like a bit of a fool.
Beside me my parents were shaking their heads
Saying, 'Why did you pee in the pool?'

You can pee in a urinal, pee on a tree.
You can pee upside-down if you need to.
You can pee in the sea if there's no one around.
Just don't pee in the pool.
No, don't pee in the pool.

(© 2019 Michael Debenham)

credits

from Treasure, released January 31, 2019

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all rights reserved

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about

Mike Debenham Melbourne, Australia

I'm a writer and musician based in Melbourne, Australia.

Not actually a goat.

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